“The more articulate one is, the more
dangerous words become.”
– May Sarton
(1912-1995)
Poet
"When there are
many words, transgression is unavoidable,
but he who restrains
his lips is wise"
- Solomon
The Book of Proverbs
10:19 / NASV
For
success-minded people who are positive, excited about life and eager to help
people, talking is something that does not come hard. In fact, it is often what we do best. That is not a bad thing, in fact, it is what
helps us do all that we do for others.
Talking allows us to communicate, encourage, excite and inspire those
who come to us for coaching. It does
however have its down side and there are a few things we should watch out
for. Here are three key areas that we
must avoid in order to be the most helpful.
1) Don't talk too much
It is very easy for those of us
who are positive and excited about life to go on and on. We have so much to say and things are so
wonderful that we can't help but want to share it. However, the client is there to talk to us,
not for us to talk to them. Pay
attention to how much you talk, even when you feel it can be helpful. In the coaching session a good average is the
client talks 75% of the time and you talk 20%.
The left over 5% is for some very welcome quiet.
2) Don't talk too fast
One of the things I discovered
in writing is this: I may know what I am saying, but my reader may have no
clue. The same is with talking. Remember, you worked, studies and researched
to be a coach. You have a good
understanding about human behavior and what brings success. Your client on the other hand may not. If you talk fast and use terms that only
coaches use, you just may lose the client.
Talk at an even pace and be clear.
Keep eye contact, and if the client looks like they are confused, stop
and ask them if they follow you.
3) Don't talk to impress
For some, having knowledge is
more of a badge of honor than a tool to be used. We have all been with the person who loves to
impress people with how much they know and all the big words they can spit at
you. Do not be that person. Nothing will damage the coaching relationship
more than to have your client feel you are talking down to them or that you are
just a bunch of hot air. You do not need
to impress anyone. It is not about you,
it is about the client. It is best to
remember the words of businessman, Michael Dell who said, "Try never to be
the smartest person in the room. And if
you are, I suggest you invite smarter people...or find a different room."
You matter to the world. You are here to make a difference and that
difference is good. Remember the
qualities of a real success-minded person: Be your best. Love God.
Have good manners. Discover the unknown.
Change the world.
John Patrick Hickey is an author, speaker,
and Life Coach. To read more from John Patrick Hickey or to get his books,
training and book him to speak to your church, business or group, visit our
website at http://www.growthcenter.net or www.johnpatrickhickey.com.
© 2014 John
Patrick Hickey
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