Never To Fail

“There are no failures - just experiences and your reaction to them.”

– Tom Krause

(1934-2013) Musician

Many of us have experiences the hurt of the client who, after doing all they knew to do, falls flat on their face.  This is even more intense for the coach when you gave them the advice in the first place.  The thing to remember here is that we all have our time of failure and disappointment.  The key is what we do with this experience that makes the difference between success and failure.

          

      No one likes to fail.  We can dress it up with all the positive talk we can find, but it is still disappointing and discouraging.  This is not only true for the client but also for the coach.  We have a lot invested in our clients.  We want them to succeed and we hold an emotional attachment to their success.  When they fall short and feel hurt and discouragement, we too feel that discouragement.  The hard part for the coach is we cannot show that.

                Now is the time to apply what we already know.  This is nothing new or original.  We know that for the success-minded person there is no failure.  Each time we meet with something less than what we hoped for, we learn and grow.  As long as we are learning and growing we are moving forward.  Many times the bigger the failure the greater the lesson learned.

                Help you client know that this is an opportunity for them to learn, grow and become stronger.  Work with them to list all the things that this failure can teach them.  Get them back on their feet right away.  Time spent whining and regretting is time wasted.  There is no redeeming value in feeling sorry for ourselves.  You, as their coach, can help them find the life lessons hidden in the rubble.

                Once you have helped them list (I do mean for you to actually write a list) the lessons to be learned, get them to apply that knowledge to a new and more deliberate attempt at their challenge.  Do not allow them to leave your office without a workable plan for the next step.  If they leave without knowing what to do next, chances are very good they will do nothing at all.

                Help your clients, and you for that matter, see that there is no failure for the person who keeps learning and moving forward.  Yes, there will be disappointments and even hard challenges, but they are not failures.  They are what is known as life.  When there is no other option but success, there is no failure or turning back.

John Patrick Hickey is an author, speaker, and Life Coach. To read more from John Patrick Hickey or to get his books, training and book him to speak to your church, business or group, visit our website at http://www.growthcenter.net or www.johnpatrickhickey.com.   © 2014 John Patrick Hickey