“Any fool can criticize,
condemn, and complain - and most fools do.”
– Dale Carnegie
(1888-1955)
Author/Speaker
"Do all things
without grumbling or disputing; so that you will prove yourselves to be
blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a
crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world."
- Saint Paul
Philippians
2:14-15 / NASV
Here is a fact that most life coaches have learned to be
true: The people who complain the most
do the least to make things better. It
is just a hard fact. I think this is
best proven by one look at social media.
Every day we are blasted with people complaining about the government,
social conditions, the economy and about other people. The complaints may even be legitimate, but
they offer no answers.
I
believe that it was Henry Ford who said, "If something is wrong, fix
it. Don't complain." It does no good to constantly be telling folks
what is wrong in your life if you will not do something to make it better. So as not to be guilty of the same wrong I am
now pointing out - allow me to help you give your clients an alternative to
complaining.
1) Think before you complain
Some people complain just
because they want something to say. In
fear that no one will notice them they think up all the problems they see and
give them out like gifts. Well, if you
want to give a gift, give one that will matter in someone's life. Try encouragement. Ask your client to look around and list what
is being done right. There is a lot of
good stuff out there. Let people know
that you appreciate the good job they are doing or the pleasant attitude they
have. Your clients will find that the
more they encourage others the more they will feel encouraged.
2) Do something to make a
difference
Do not fall into the old trap of
thinking, "There is nothing I can do." There is always something you can do. I love the thinking of American writer,
Anthony D'Angelo who said, "Realize that if you have time to whine and
complain about something then you have the time to do something about
it." By just being a better human being
you make society better. Help your
client to be creative and think of what they do that can make the life of those
around them better, more comfortable or safer.
3) Make an immediate effect - stop
complaining
Ask your client to think of how
their day would go if in the morning they clicked on to their favorite social
media site and found nothing but good news!
No complaints of how bad things are getting or pictures of the dead and
dying. Rather they see words of encouragement. Words that encourage them to live well, be
safe, help others, do good deeds and change the world.
4) Make a difference
I am
not saying we need to bury our heads and ignore the wrong or injustice in the
world. I am saying that complaining
about it does absolutely no good at all.
Do something! Be an active person
and give all you have to make the world better.
Be a light in the darkness, don't just complain that it is dark. You and your clients must understand that you
can make a difference. You just may be
the person that will change it all. You
may be the one to come up with the thinking we have all been waiting for. Someone has to do it, why not you?
5) Make an effort to make things
better, not to point out the obvious
Help you clients see that they
must start with the only thing they have the power to change - themselves. Be positive.
Be productive. Be an example of
goodness and right living. Be a
giver. Make people laugh and smile. Care for those who need care and be willing
to give a loving kick in the butt to those who need one. I believe that Billy Graham summed it up
perfectly when he said, "Read the Bible.
Work hard and honestly. And don't
complain."
You matter to the world. You are here to make a difference and that
difference is good. Remember the
qualities of a real success-minded person: Be your best. Love God.
Have good manners. Discover the unknown. Change the world.
John Patrick Hickey is an author, speaker,
and Life Coach. To read more from John Patrick Hickey or to get his books,
training and book him to speak to your church, business or group, visit our
website at http://www.growthcenter.net or www.johnpatrickhickey.com.
© 2014 John
Patrick Hickey
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